Wants and Needs

I am going to ramble around here...

What do I teach my children? Here's a common mantra:

Just because you WANT  something doesn't mean you NEED it.
Just because you want to do or say something doesn't mean you should!

This lesson applies to so very many issues in life!
 
There was a time in our country that people couldn't have what they couldn't pay for. I desperately wanted Art Lessons from our local Art Museum. Desperately. My parents couldn't afford for me to go, so I couldn't go. I had a great paying job in high school and could have probably afforded to go if I paid my own way, but then, I had not time to be able to go.

I want steak, but I cannot afford it, so I do not buy it.

I want to buy blueberries and strawberries every week. I cannot afford to do that, so I don't. We have planted blueberry bushes because a friend was kind enough to give us some of the new plants that were growing among his own. We will try planting our own strawberries because we have saved seeds from large berries.

We wanted a very large house for our family. We wanted a "move in ready" kind of house. Well, the beautiful ones in the next county north were well out of our price range. The big beautiful ones in our county were still out of that range. We were able to afford an old "fixer-upper," so that is what we bought. 





 $280,000   3800 square feet



aLOT less money  with 2800 square feet..and still 4 bathrooms!

We were able to borrow money because we had excellent credit, and did not borrow beyond our means to pay (even though they told us we could and the realtors kept telling us we should!!)  The government gave loans to people who had no credit or bad credit, and was then shocked when those loans did not and could not be repaid! 

Apparently it is un-American of me to expect people to deny themselves pleasure unless they can afford it. 


The other day, there was a congressional hearing where this was said-

“Forty percent of the female students at Georgetown Law reported to us that they struggled financially as a result of this policy,” Fluke said, referring to the fact that the university doesn’t pay for contraception. “Without insurance coverage, contraception, as you know, can cost a woman over $3,000 during law school.”

What? Huh? Why??

I didn't spend anything on contraception when I was in college. I couldn't afford it, well I could have afforded it if I really had wanted to..well I did really want to sometimes, but that is another story altogether!  Maybe I couldn't have bought it..what do condoms cost anyway? Seems $1000/year worth would buy ALOT..hmm. I looked around on Amazon and found 100 for $20....that would be 50 packs of 100..or 5000 condoms.

huh? Who has sex that much??? Wait, how many years is law school? Let me see, seems like 3 years is the norm...um 15,000 condoms over the course of 3 years in law school?? And people are getting mad at Rush for using the word slut?

(I don't agree with name calling don't get me wrong..I really think that is inappropriate for anyone to say.)

Not trying to be rude, but seriously? Surely law students have access to Amazon so that even if they wanted to use one condom a day they could spend $100/year  instead of $1000.

No wonder why a lawyer's services cost so much....lol

I know people who do use birth control and I am pretty sure that most of them they cannot afford $1000 year so they figure out a cheaper way...even if it is an "aspirin between their knees!"

Honestly, I don't see what is wrong with what this man said. At all.

Ok-let the anger fly - - -

Marriage and relationships

Holy smokes, I was going to rant and rant about what makes a good marriage and I stumbled across this link. Pretty much sums up what I was going to say.

A few addendums: haha! You thought I'd leave it at that!

Each and every one of us is a poor, miserable sinner (Romans 3:23), iow, selfish and self-serving. Yeah, so how are two selfish people supposed to stay married?? Can you see how very difficult, near impossible accomplishing the goal of a life-long, happy marriage is?

The Bible says, "We love, because God first loved us." (1 John 4:19) I am singing a little Sunday School ditty in my head right now. We, in our deepest heart, are selfish toddlers. You don't think you are selfish? All you have to do is consider all of the things you want from your spouse. We all have a list. Ok, so I know *I* have a list! The problem comes in when that dear, loving, spouse does not give us what we want..whether we have communicated that desire or not. So very many times, we feel we deserve these desires to be met.

Now, go back to Romans 3:23. None of us deserve anything from God..the perfect, holy God...not even a sinless spouse! (Truthfully, even if we did have a perfect spouse, we'd even get mad at them! You know I am right!)

Now consider this, your spouse has this very same list of desires for you! uh oh. hmm. You know what at least some of them are. I know things from my dh's (dear husband's) list. I fail him over and over again.

The Bible speaks of Christ and His Church as a marriage. Selfless. Christ lays down His life for the sake of His dear Church. She does NOT deserve His faithfulness as she is constantly unfaithful. Really unfaithful. The entire book of  Hosea is a picture of  this. The Old Testament is chock full of these stories. Yet, Christ loves her anyway. (Hosea is a type of Christ - pointing to what Christ will do for His bride.)

This is what we are called to do. Love our spouse more than we love ourselves. We are to think of his/her needs more than our own. We are to serve each other out of reverence to Christ. Oh boy. I am not good at this. Don't ask my dh. I don't want him to tell you how unsuccessful I am in this way.

This is where the crux of a good marriage lies.

FORGIVENESS.



Now, I am so not saying this is easy. I am not saying that the second the other fails we just forgive them. We are only human afterall.  It can take awhile to get through the emotions. Mine are good at getting in the way. BUT Christ forgave me. I do not deserve it from Christ and therefore not even from my dh. I forgive my dh because God forgave me. Dh forgives me for the same reason. Christ gave me His Spirit, to give me His power to forgive. Like I said, I get in the way and like to hold on to my anger. (I hate that about myself.) But God, in His great kindness, has so much forgiveness, gave and still gives me so very much of that forgiveness that I can give it to others.


Truthfully, this is true for ALL relationships we have.

Returning!

You know this isn't really me by the smile on my face, right?

 WOW. It has been a very long time since I've posted on a regular basis! Between my "baby," now almost 3 and my attachment to Face Book, this blog got left in the dust! In the last few weeks I have discovered that FB is not conducive to my many rants. In light of that,  I think it is time for me to dust off the old blog (cause I sneeze too much from dusting in my house!) and get writing again!